Fernz: Painting #1

Fernz 18" x 24"

For a long time I was a photographer. Mostly, I took pictures of nature, lots of plants and the volcano which is about 15 miles down the road and was very active at the time. I used to drive to the end of the road at 4am, park the car and hike a mile or so in the dark over fields of pahoehoe lava. Just me with my trusty little flashlight and several cameras. I went out for months and got miles of film and thousands of pictures. I would set up my tripod with the camcorder, planting it in a prime spot to capture the best footage, and then wander around with my Olympus digital and get up close and personal. I used to take my images and make posters and postcards to sell.

Waikupanaaha Eruption, 7/22/2008

Plants was my other photographic passion. Now, you're probably thinking, "Passionate about plants, hmmm. Volcanoes, yes! But plants?" I used to go on a 3 mile walk everyday in my neighborhood and always took my camera. I never got tired of photographing the plants. In a weeks time I probably shot all the different plants on the street but never tired of taking more pictures. Why? The light and shadow at different times of day, the patterns and textures, the combinations of plants, how the weather effected all of it, and on and on. The plants always had something new, beautiful and awe-inspiring to show me each time I went. Different from volcano action certainly but just as profound in a humble plant sort of way. I used to take my photos and morph them into mandalas and other healing images. I had this idea that just looking at these images was as healing as taking flower essences or using essential oils. My business at that time was called Images That Heal. I talked to plants and they started talking back. They gave me little tips about how to combine my pictures of different plants to create a healing image, and how those images affected whoever looked at them. It was very woowoo, very magical and lots of fun.

Blue Flowers Mandala

So, why am I rattling on about photography and talking to plants in a painting blog? Because my obsession with trying to capture the essence and simplistic beauty of plants has never left me. Photography opened up for me new ways of seeing and communicating with the world around me and I find I am now trying to do that with my paints. It is definitely different but also very much the same. My eyes are still searching for that elusive something I am trying to capture in my work, only now I am searching for it within.

Orange Flowers Mandala

Fernz was the first painting I completed when I took Flora Bowley's Bloom True E-course (can't recommend that enough! Go to florabowley.com for more information and great painting experiences.) It took me a long time to finish my painting. I had 4 canvases I was working on simultaneously, but really didn't know how to get out of the mark-making and layering loops I was stuck in. These are techniques of Flora's and they are profound and extremely helpful to beginning painters. It's the finishing that can be more of a challenge, at least for me! Anyway, at the time I was painting in an open area under the house and there were lots of ferns growing around. Once I noticed them I was on my way back to re-discovering why I loved ferns so much as a photographer and how I could now express that with paint.

Fernz was my first brave, bold attempt to do that, moving beyond all the nagging doubts: I don't know how to paint; I have no idea what I am doing; everyone will laugh at this, at me; who am I trying to kid; and on and on. Finishing Fernz shut those voices down for a few precious moments and gave me a dazzling glimpse into who I was beyond fear--as an artist! At least for long enough to begin again. And so the cycle goes and each time it completes I am a little more confident that I can express myself a bit more eloquently or outrageously or  however it is I want to paint. Painting is so cool!

I've taken Fernz off the wall a couple of times since I've finished it and have made adjustments, fixing this thing or that thing that bugged me. No matter, it is one of my favorites and will always be special to me because it was the beginning of this wild and crazy painting adventure.